Precious

I've felt lower than this in the past to be sure, but that seems of little consolation to me at the moment. I stand here, yet again, heartbroken and seeking refuge in all sorts of maladaptive behaviors. I'm trying to dull the pain, make time go by faster, but thus far my attempts have been futile at best.

It's a chore to wake up every morning. Every morning is a reminder of just how big a a loser I am. No job, no money, no prospects, painfully alone; sleep alone, wake up alone, eat alone, grieve alone, all alone.

I fucking hate this feeling. This feeling of social isolation, of not fitting in anywhere, and of not being accepted. Acceptance is key, but acceptance of my sorry state is not a pleasant task.

All I know is I hurt. I hurt, like I've hurt many times in the past, and by definition hurt does not feel good.

It sucks!

I need to stay positive and stay focused. Ha ha, focused! That's rich. Focused, tough to stay focused as intoxicated as I am!

I need help!

When In Doubt...

Let it be.

Europe 8-2012

Stomachache

I don’t know how many more exercises in humility I can stomach.

That Was Quick

-I don't understand things were going so great. What happened? Something must've happened!

-It's not you, it's me!

-You're giving ME the "it's not you, it's me routine?" I invented the "it's not you, it's me!" Nobody tells me it's them not me. If it's anybody then it's me!

-All right, George, it's you!

-You're damn right it's me!

-Look I was just trying to...

-I know what you were trying to do. Nobody does it better than me!

-I'm sure you do it very well.

-Ha ha, yes well. Unfortunately you'll never get the chance to find out.

I Heart VLD

The picture you see is no portrait of me
It's too real to be shown to someone I don't know
And it's driving me wild
It makes me act like a child

-New Order

Curse

Social awkwardness is often the curse of genius.

-Justified

Attraction Is A Tough Nut To Crack

She's A Stubborn Mistress

Let go of the darkness… How is that even possible?

-Dexter